MAY 9, 2012 EDIT:

Please don't read Jimmy here! Tinypic deleted a lot of my pictures and the Flash animations aren't working anymore anyway.

Jimmy has been totally and permanently archived on my web site, so read it there instead!

www.poorshark.com/jimmy/

~~~

(Originally posted April 19, 2009)

SEPTEMBER 11 EDIT:

A couple of weeks ago, our server host was attacked, and RV was unfortunately rolled back by about 10 months. This, of course, completely decimated the original The Adventures of Jimmy topic, and all 38 pages of posts therein. As much of a loss as that was, it's not going to stop us. Here are, in order, as many posts of the storyline as I could salvage (and the ones that I couldn't, I've replaced to the best of my memory.) (Yes, that makes for a lot of hypocritical double-posting at first, but they're all real posts we lost. )

MAY 24 EDIT:

For future reference, this is the point where The Adventures of Jimmy was moved from the Legends Discussion forum to the Roleplay and Literary Society. I started this just over five weeks ago, and despite my...uh...creative/artistic shortcomings, I've had an absolute blast making it. Jimmy has gone in more directions already than I ever imagined (or predicted.)

Due to a few different circumstances, the active players in LD dropped to a handful or so, so I decided to continue Jimmy's adventures out here in the public forums. I noticed WeirdBoy started up a similar thing recently, and that's going pretty well, so I have no doubt this'll continue to work, too.

Just a couple of ground rules for the newcomers, partially based off what I've seen in WeirdBoy's topic:

• Read through the entire topic before posting. You have to know the layout of the game, how it works, and in a nutshell, the spirit of the game, to be able to play it.
• Do not double post. This isn't Mafia. -.-;
• You can sort of play off of other people's ideas, but don't start entire huge side discussions, please. As mentioned in the topic, I won't immediately use every suggestion. Spend more time making your own suggestions and less time explaining why other people shouldn't use theirs.

That should do it! Enjoy the fun!

(Original post starts below)
~~~

MSPaintAdventures started a new storyline, and it's quite fun. I always wanted to try one of these, myself. We'll see how long it goes.

I can't draw. You have been warned.

Feel free to be as nonsensical and creative as you wish. I'm going to try to apply a certain amount of rationality, though; his arms aren't going to fall off or anything (or get stabbed in the eye and live, etc.)

~~~



You are JIMMY, an employee on the 23rd floor of the APEX MICROCHIPS COMPANY BUILDING. For whatever reason, you feel particularly apathetic about working today.

You are standing in your CUBICLE. On the left you can plainly see a FILE CABINET with a PINK STAPLER on top of it. There is a PIECE OF PAPER pinned to the cubicle wall. To the right is a COMPUTER MONITOR.

>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 19, 2009)

Extra info: The way the actual MSPaintAdventures works is that people submit tons and tons of comics, and the author picks like one (or a few) at a time. For this reason I may not cover all suggestions at once. If I didn't take your suggestion, but you feel it's still relevant, feel free to post it again. Maybe I skipped it at a certain time on purpose!

~~~

>> READ PIECE OF PAPER



The PIECE OF PAPER has scribbles all over it, for whatever reason. You don't recall. Hmm...

>> VIEW DILBERT COMIC



You thought this DILBERT COMIC was pretty funny, so you pinned it on your CUBICLE WALL. You don't remember if the company policy of APEX MICROCHIPS allows you to post funny things on the walls. Probably not.

>> Grab Stapler



You pick up the PINK STAPLER and stash it in your inventory. You have no real reason for doing so besides the inexplicable feeling that it may, at some point in time, come in handy.

>> Investigate Filing Cabinet
>> Investigate Blue Thing behind Filing Cabinet



The FILING CABINET is what it is: a FILING CABINET with three doors. Cool.

The blue thing turns out to be a LARGE BINDER. It would probably be on a table somewhere if you actually had some desk space.

>> Play Minesweeper



You would like to play the popular addicting game, Minesweeper, but your MONITOR seems to be off!

>> go to IT DEPARTMENT and requisition COMPUTER

Oh wow, it seems you don't have an actual COMPUTER, either. You're not sure if that's the way to get one, though. Perhaps you should look around some more, first.

>> Retrieve arms

You've already got arms, silly!

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 19, 2009)

I don't really wish to give options away, but remember that I'm not going to always tell the whole story. You can further interact with things (like the Dilbert comic, or the piece of paper) just like you would in real life. And feel free to turn the monitor on--it's plugged in, and maybe not connected, but off. I didn't say you couldn't play Minesweeper because you had no computer, but because the monitor was off.

~~~

>> Open top drawer

You open the top drawer of the FILE CABINET and find 7 STAPLES.

>> Open middle drawer

The middle drawer of the FILE CABINET is suspiciously locked.

>> Open bottom drawer

You open the bottom drawer of the FILE CABINET and find 3 ONE-DOLLAR BILLS and a MAGIC 8-BALL.

>> Take all

Your PINK STAPLER was apparently empty. You load it with the 7 STAPLES you found.
You also take the 3 ONE-DOLLAR BILLS and the MAGIC 8-BALL and stash them in your inventory.





>> Use BINDER on FILE CABINET

You open the LARGE BINDER and place it on top of the FILE CABINET. Wow, this thing is huge! It's 4,096 pages long and filled with reports, diagrams, and otherwise utter nonsense. There's no way you can read this right now--you don't even know where to start. (The ironic connection between 4,096 being 2 to the 12th power and your occupation dealing with computer parts is not lost on you.)

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 20, 2009)

>> Turn Monitor On



D'oh! Your MONITOR immediately goes into POWER SAVE MODE. Apparently it does that when there's no COMPUTER connected to it. Without a COMPUTER, this MONITOR is essentially useless.

>> View back of paper



You take the PIECE OF PAPER off your CUBICLE WALL and flip it over. It turns out to be a MEMO sent approximately six months ago, saying that your previously-broken COMPUTER is ready for pickup. You don't remember why you tacked it to your wall, backwards, and then scribbled on it. It probably seemed like a good idea at the time.

You also begin to wonder if you've done any actual work in the last six months.



Since the MEMO is a CLAIM CHECK and you don't want to take any chances (heck, it's been a while already) you immediately stash the CLAIM CHECK in your inventory.

>> Peer into the next cubicle



You look around the corner into the next CUBICLE. It appears to be completely empty.

>> Attempt to staple Dilbert Comic to forehead.

You consider this, but in the end decide it's probably not a good idea for two reasons: 1) It will probably hurt, and 2) It would use up 14.3% of your STAPLE AMMO.

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 21, 2009)

The reduced clarity in the second picture is due to animation. It looks just as sharp (and badly-slash-hastily-drawn ) as all the others when it's still.

~~~

>> Leave CUBICAL
>> Go to WATER COOLER



You leave your CUBICLE and head towards the ELEVATORS. Coincidentally, the WATER COOLER is there, but apparently there's no one talking over it, as one would commonly assume.

>> Go to 18th floor
>> Take the stairs, not the lift.

The ELEVATORS are on Floor 18 and Floor 1, respectively. You decide not to wait on them and take the STAIRS instead. What a great way to get some exercise around the workplace!

The STAIRWELL is rather creepy. Apparently MANAGEMENT didn't care much about sprucing it up. The floor numbers are crudely drawn above the doors in green paint. (At least there are guardrails.) You head down five floors of STAIRS before arriving at the DOOR TO FLOOR 18.



OH SNAP IT'S A SPIDER. You're normally not a fan of violence, but MAN that thing is creeping you out! It's really fast, too.

You've got to find a way to dispatch this SPIDER. Perhaps if you were to equip some kind of weapon...?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 21, 2009)

>> use FOOT on SPIDER

No way, man! That thing would just evade your foot and then run up your pant leg!

>> equip STAPLER
>> fire STAPLE at SPIDER

You equip your STAPLER. You embrace the cold, pink steel and double-check to see that its ammo is loaded. Instinctively, you fire a STAPLE at the SPIDER, leaving you with 6 STAPLES of ammunition left.



Somehow you manage to make the STAPLE actually hit the SPIDER, making it dizzy and lowering its already-miniscule HP by 51%.



The SPIDER attempts to counter-attack but is too far away. It begins closing in on you!

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 22, 2009)

Tons of tangents I didn't expect--yesssss. This is where the real fun begins.

~~~

>> Throw STAPLER at SPIDER

The STAPLER is your equipped weapon! It doesn't seem like a good idea to just chuck it. That's like someone throwing a HANDGUN at SUPERMAN without ever firing a BULLET!

>> Talk to spider
>> Bribe Spider to leave you alone.



You try to console the SPIDER and offer it one of your ONE-DOLLAR BILLS, but it keeps coming closer to you. Darn the luck, your offer must be too low!

>> Ask the magic 8-ball how to defeat the Spider.



You quickly shake your MAGIC 8-BALL and look at its underside. You swear you've never seen a message like that before, but hey, if the MAGIC 8-BALL suggested it, it's probably a good idea, right? Right. (...Probably.)

>> Fold one of the $1 bills into an origami sword and use it to fight the SPIDER





You put the STAPLER back in your inventory for later use, and whip out one of your three ONE-DOLLAR BILLS. With lightning-fast origami reflexes gained from six months of not doing work, you fashion it into an ORIGAMI DOLLAR SWORD and equip it. You're surely a force to be reckoned with now! That SPIDER's doomed for sure. All you need now is a cool finishing move...

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 24, 2009)

I took a day off to focus on school. It also doesn't help that I don't watch/read Bleach.

Flash is weird. When making .GIFs, it splatters text...or something. I dunno. I put two versions up, the Flash will be much more preferable.

~~~

>> Use BANKAI



In a feat of strength previously only seen in animated television shows and graphic novels, you let out a large shout in an attempt to summon the powers hidden in your sword. ...Or something along those lines.

Flash Version
Gif Version
(Open spoiler for text:)

Hidden: 

You release the powers of your ONE-DOLLAR BILL ORIGAMI SWORD, which turns out to be the spirit of GEORGE WASHINGTON. His likeness washes over the SPIDER, finishing it off instantly. In hindsight, that was probably overkill.

The SPIDER is dead.

You gained 2 EXP!

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 26, 2009)

>> Advance to level 2.

Not enough EXP!

>> Revel in the smug feeling of self-satisfaction from defeating that mildly dangerous spider

Gosh, you are so amazingly awesome. You revel for a moment before realizing the SPIDER'S CORPSE is still there on the ground.

>> Loot CORPSE



You loot the SPIDER'S CORPSE and find a dull PENNY! A PENNY saved is a PENNY earned, as they say.



You add the PENNY to your inventory in the slot with the ONE-DOLLAR BILLS. It makes sense that all money should be stackable. In addition, you unfold your ONE-DOLLAR BILL ORIGAMI SWORD now that the danger's over. In all, you have $3.01.

>> Eat Corpse

That's disgusting!



...but you end up doing it anyway. The SPIDER tastes disgusting, much as you thought it would. But by overcoming your fear in this strange situation, you suddenly gain 2 ADVERSITY POINTS.

>> Kick door to IT Department Down, rather than risk being electrocuted as a stupid prank someone attempted by rigging an electrical source to the Doornob.



Not one for subtlety, you kick the FLOOR 18 DOOR clear off of its hinges. It might have been a cool move, but in hindsight you look really, really silly.

Also there's probably something against this in the APEX MICROCHIP COMPANY CODE OF ETHICS.

>> go to IT DEPARTMENT
>> Brag to IT guys about your victory.



Before you can brag about your victory, the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE begins scolding you.
"What the heck did you do? You kicked the door to the stairway entirely out of its frame! Do you realize how many spiders we're going to have to deal with now?"
You decide to skip the pleasantries and show him your CLAIM CHECK.
"...October 2008? Oh, I know--the one that's been sitting on our shelves for months. If you want it, there's a late fee of $1.75. Just be glad I'm not fining you to fix the door."

>>

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 27, 2009)

>> Attempt to haggle with IT guy to lower the late fee price.
>> Use penny to bribe IT guy to look the other way as you reclaim your computer.

It doesn't work. Your BARTERING LEVEL is way too low!

>> Distract ICT guy and steal computer

You're pretty sure your COMPUTER is in the room behind the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE, and the only way you can get it back is if he goes and gets it for you. Tough luck!

>> take bell
>> Take bell and equip.



You remove the CLAIM CHECK from your inventory and place it on the ledge. In a flash of agility, you grab the BELL and equip it. You might not be able to do much damage with it, but the SPECTRUM OF SOUND WAVES is surely in for it now!

>> ring BELL repeatedly until demands are met.



You start ringing your equipped BELL in the name of truth, justice, and getting your COMPUTER back.

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE is understandably quite annoyed at your antics, but he offers to waive the late fee if you just hand over your CLAIM CHECK, give him your awesome-looking STAPLER, and return the BELL to its proper location. (He's probably just paying it himself to get you out of his hair.)

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted April 28, 2009)

(Thanks to Azn in advance for making me a clean GIF. )
~~~

>> accept OFFER



You accept the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE's offer. You give him your CLAIM CHECK and put the BELL back where it belongs. Reluctantly, you also hand over your PINK STAPLER. You probably weren't going to use it for anything else anyway, but you feel like it's been a part of you forever. Parting is such sweet sorrow.

>> say "I BELIEVE YOU HAVE MY STAPLER".



OH MAN WHAT AN IDEA. Being as suave as you can possibly muster, you non-chalantly ask for your PINK STAPLER back. You never shook on the deal or anything, so it's still yours, right?

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE apparently disagrees, and regards you with another wave of contempt. What a jerk.

>> Turn "Please Ring Bell" sign upside down.



As soon as the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE heads to the back room to go fetch your COMPUTER, you immediately run over and shift the "PLEASE RING BELL" SIGN. That'll teach him for not giving you back your STAPLER!

>> DANCE



For little to no reason at all, you start dancing to your heart's content. You're finally getting your COMPUTER back; what a joyous occasion this is! You can dance if you want to, and you can certainly leave those STAIRWELL-DWELLING SPIDERS behind!

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE suddenly comes in from the side with your COMPUTER and wonders what the heck you're doing.

>> follow up with "NO SERIOUSLY, I WANT MY STAPLER."

You decide to give your plea a second try, as if the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE simply didn't understand you the first time. Surely he's had a change of heart and will give you back your PINK STAPLER now, right?



Wrong. Apparently he's had just about enough of your antics, and equips the PINK STAPLER on his own. If you don't grab your COMPUTER and get out, he says, he'll open fire. Given your LEVEL 1 status and inherently-low HIT POINTS, you probably shouldn't test his patience any more than you already have.

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 1, 2009)

Yeah, that didn't work all that well for yours, either. Anyway, had exams (still have Final Exams this coming week), so yeah.

I figured you guys would give up. But I guess not--and that's good--this guy will make for an excellent first boss. And as such, he needs an epic first boss intro!

This page is in Flash, and has sound. I threw an entire song in for the fun of it, so there's a slight up-front loading time. It's also only 12 seconds long but it still took me two hours to make whoo.

~~~

>> Equip ORIGAMI DOLLAR SWORD
>> Wield penny as a miniature shield and hope to block all incoming missing attacks.

Ohhhhh no. He's not getting off that easily! The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE has shunned you and bribed you for your PINK STAPLER and who knows what else. He's going down, and the 18TH FLOOR of the APEX MICROCHIPS BUILDING is the perfect spot to do it.



You re-fold and equip your ONE-DOLLAR BILL ORIGAMI SWORD with lightning-fast reflexes, and wield the PENNY as a shield against a possible STAPLE BARRAGE.

ENGAGEMENT...BEGIN!
(Click the above link for animation)

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 5, 2009)

I didn't forget about this (and don't plan to) but I had final exams last week and this week. Rest assured I'm not just going to let it die.

~~~

>> Complain the music is too loud.

Noted.

>>Throw 8ball



You throw the MAGIC 8-BALL at the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE, dealing a good amount of damage. Amazingly, the MAGIC 8-BALL does not break upon hitting the ground. Maybe it has something to do with this strange, otherworldly space you seem to be battling in?

>> shield bash



In the middle of your shield bash attempt, the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE fires 3 staples at you. You manage to deflect one with your PENNY SHIELD! The other two hit dead-on, causing minimal damage.

>> Give him a fierce paper cut
>> use DOLLAR SWORD OF DOOM on IT EMPLOYEE's JUGULAR



You dash forward and slash at the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE with your ONE-DOLLAR BILL ORIGAMI SWORD, aiming for a critical hit in his neck region. It gives him a pretty bad paper cut. That's going to sting for days on end!



He's getting really mad, now! The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE counterattacks with another STAPLE BARRAGE of three staples. You attempt to auto-parry one of them, but only manage in altering its trajectory. It still ends up hitting you, along with the other two. Ouch!

>> Query magical abilities.



You open the MAGIC TAB in your menu, which displays a listing of the magics you know and their respective descriptions. (How long has this been here...?) The spells listed here are color-coded:
- Green for healing or defensive
- Red for attacking or offensive
- Brown for neutral
It looks like you only know the GRAVITY spell at this point in time, and that's not going to directly do any harm to the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE whatsoever...

>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 7, 2009)

>> cast gravity on stapler



You cast the spell GRAVITY on the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE's equipped weapon, and laugh as he struggles to hold it. As far as you can tell, his defenses are totally down!

You wonder how many things you can cast GRAVITY on before it inexplicably will fail to work.



Another look at your MAGIC TAB reveals the answer. You can clearly see by your MAGIC SURPLUS GAUGE (was this here earlier?) that you have two MAGIC POINTS (hereafter referred to as MP.) Also, it looks like the "(1) - " next to GRAVITY's description means that it takes 1 MP to cast. You have 1 MP left.

>> CHECK STATS!



You look at your STATS TAB, which displays a bunch of general information about you, including your NAME, LEVEL, RANK TITLE, HP, EXP, EXP TO NEXT LEVEL, and other SKILL LEVELS. You still have the 2 EXP gained from killing that loathsome SPIDER earlier, and 2 ADVERSITY POINTS from eating it. It looks like those 2 ADVERSITY POINTS turned into 20% ADVERSITY EXP. Other skill levels seem to be hidden for the time being.

Your STATS TAB also shows your current mood. You look menacing, almost as if you were in a heated battle of some sort!

>>Use GRAVITY on IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE

You see no floor under the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE, true.
But you also see no floor under yourself, either.
It reminds you of Closed Space...except without all the skyscrapers and paperclips.

>>Use gravity on sword
>>Throw sword at IT employee



You cast GRAVITY on your ONE-DOLLAR BILL ORIGAMI SWORD and send it flying. Unfortunately, the paper sword's inherent AIR RESISTANCE combined with the EXTRA WEIGHT you seemed to add to it makes it hit the ground long before it reaches the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE. You also used up your last MP for a while. Way to go, chief.

>> Pick up magic 8 ball.
>> Ask magic 8 ball the chance of victory.



You pick up the MAGIC 8-BALL, shake it, and examine its underside.



Gosh, the MAGIC 8-BALL seems to know everything. Its proclamation of your apparent imminent victory gives you confidence in the battle ahead.



You put the MAGIC 8-BALL back in your INVENTORY, which is now nicely sequestered to its own little tab as well. Very snazzy.

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE begins to lift his STAPLER. You think you can hear him growling at you.

>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 8, 2009)

>> Check for Silver.

No SILVER found!

>> check LAWS OF PHYSICS

You're not entirely sure if the LAWS OF PHYSICS apply in your world. Nonetheless, your GRAVITY spell pretty much only added to the ORIGAMI SWORD's WEIGHT ATTRIBUTE, which is why it fell as fast as it did.

>> fold up remaining dollar bills into origami swords
>> DUAL WIELD TIME
>> DUAL WIELD ATTACK FRENZY AT HIS NECK

That sounds like a great idea! ...Unfortunately, you don't have the DUAL-WIELD ABILITY yet. It might have something to do with only being at Level 1. Would you still like to refold one of the ONE-DOLLAR BILLS into a single ORIGAMI SWORD?

>> Retreat, you are clearly losing this battle. You should farm on Spiders for a while.



The notion seems feasible, but you don't know where the EXITS are in this blasted place. It looks like you have no choice but to see this battle to its end!

In the meantime, the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE finally raises his weapon, and with a shaking grip, gets ready to fire another STAPLE BARRAGE. Do something, fast!

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 12, 2009)

Completely irrelevant things have a fairly good probability of being added, actually. Just gotta watch the line between silly and dumb though.

>> File complaint about slow updates

Thanks for keeping me going. I actually have very valid reasons for why I've been so busy, but I'm not going to bother anyone with the details. ONWARD TO EPICNESS?

~~~

>> Fashion a ball and chain using the dollar bills and the staples on the floor around you!



That sounds like a fairly good idea, but unfortunately, the STAPLES fell through the floor after being fired and have been falling downward for such a long time that you can't even see them anymore. Despite that, you seem to be on firm invisible ground. What the heck is up with this place? At this point you just want to leave, but as mentioned before, there aren't any exits, either.

>> Don't waste time and effort folding another sword, leap forward and grab the gravity-enhanced sword and use your momentum to launch it even further, possibly severing a limb off the IT Guy.



You dash forward to grab the ORIGAMI SWORD that's already on the ground. You grab it and begin to stand back up, only to realize that the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE has fully overcome his defenselessness. He's already crossed the distance between you and him, and is pointing his weapon directly at you! And from the looks of those shining yellow lines beginning to protrude from the ground, he's powering up for a devastatingly powerful attack!

OH NO! It's the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE's LEVEL 5 STAPLETECH: MEGATON STAPLE! He's focusing ALL of his energy into a single shot! The added weight given to the STAPLER and the STAPLE by your GRAVITY spell is going to cause more damage, and you're about to be obliterated in one fell swoop! How could you let your guard down like this?!



It's all over for you...



...nothing happens. Unbeknownst to the IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE, the PINK STAPLER ran out of ammunition long ago. Remember how you started with 7 STAPLES, fired one at the STAIRWELL SPIDER, and he fired the other 6?



You cease the moment and finish your opponent.



You suddenly find yourself back on the 18TH FLOOR of the APEX MICROCHIPS BUILDING! The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE is alive, it seems, but is out cold from those nasty papercuts. Way to go!

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE drops your PINK STAPLER as well as a SCRAP OF PAPER. Your COMPUTER is still sitting against the wall.

Congratulations! You gained 10 EXP from winning the battle!

You have reached Level 2!
Your HP has increased by 3!
Your rank has been upgraded!
You have learned a new spell: HASTE!
Unrelated to the battle, you replenished 1 MP.




>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 13, 2009)

Lmao @ June.


~~~

>> cannibalize corpse to regain HP

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE is much bigger than that SPIDER from earlier. Also you don't want to risk waking him up and getting trapped in that purple/pink area all over again.

>> Loot IT body

The IT DEPARTMENT EMPLOYEE himself has nothing.

>> Pick up stapler
>> Pick up paper

Done, although the PINK STAPLER has no ammunition. You also replace the ONE-DOLLAR BILL and the PENNY you were using since the danger's really over this time. (Assumably.)



>> Pick up computer.

The COMPUTER is very bulky and heavy--it won't fit in your INVENTORY! If you want to take it somewhere, you'll have to carry it...

>> Grab bell



Drat, your INVENTORY is full! You leave the BELL where it is.

>> head to CUBICLE



The notion of having to carry this huge thing up five floors of stairs seems very unappealing to you, but you brace yourself for the anaerobic exercise that lies ahead...

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Originally posted May 16, 2009)

>> Write a letter to the editor complaining about the expectations of lugging a computer down the stairs.

That's a good idea. How on earth do they expect you to haul that huge thing up the stairs? Maybe when you get your computer back to your cubicle and all hooked up you could type up a memo. At the moment, though, you're too busy to bother.

>> read INVENTORY NOTE
>> discard INVENTORY NOTE



The SCRAP OF PAPER has something written on it. How odd.
The other side is blank. You discard the SCRAP OF PAPER.

>> DROP EVERYTHING
>> take BELL
>> STOP, BELLTIME.

(View Flash animation first)

With a new space open in your INVENTORY, you grab the BELL. You then proceed to dump everything else on the ground and try to play a song. You can hear the music in your head, but for some reason you're just not good enough at getting the rhythm down right. Regardless, for this impromptu musical interlude, you gain 10% Toccata EXP!



You pick everything back up, keeping the bell this time.

>> Drink some of the water to replenish health



Good idea! You drink some of the WATER in the WATERCOOLER. The WATERCOOLER's reserves go down to 90%, and you regain the 3 HP you were missing!

>> ride water machine down the stairs.

You feel kind of afraid of doing this, actually. But you pretend it's a sled on a snow-covered hill, and push off.



OH MY GOD THAT WAS AWESOME. You're dizzy as heck and suddenly really wet for some reason, but OH MAN THAT WAS TOTALLY WORTH IT. The WATERCOOLER ended up hitting the wall at the bottom of the STAIRS and burst into pieces. The BASE and CUPHOLDER detached, the two DISPENSER TABS flew off, and the WATER TANK broke open and spilled its contents everywhere. You're also an extra floor downward now.

...But yeah. As far as you're concerned, that was epic. For conquering your fear of flying down a stairwell on top of a plastic water dispenser, you gained 20% Adversity EXP!

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Original post lost)

>> fashion a necklace out of "dizzy halo" and hot and cold tabs from water machine and equip.

As you reach for the DIZZY HALO, it vanishes! Perhaps if you were more adept at interacting with IMAGINARY OBJECTS...

>> Equip cup holder tube thing as new weapon



You have created the WATERCOOLER BAZOOKA! ...It fires cups! For undertaking this feat of engineering (and succeeding), you gained 30% CONSTRUCTION EXP!

>> equip WATER COOLER JUG as armor.



You try to do this, but having a feeling that it's not going to work out, for two reasons. One, the WATER COOLER JUG doesn't actually have a HOLE for your HEAD to go through. And two, your HEAD couldn't fit even if it wanted, because the JUG is so small (illustrated by the red arrows in the picture.)

>> Climb back up to computer.



You climb back up to FLOOR 18 and reach where you left your COMPUTER. Through some sort of unexplained change in your UNIVERSE, you find that you can now carry your COMPUTER if you want!



However, you don't have any INVENTORY SPACE. If you want to carry your COMPUTER, you'll have to make room for it somehow.

>> Check status tab and EXP tab



Your STATS tab reflects your recent EXPERIENCE GAINS. It also shows your current STATUS (HEALTHY).

>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Original post lost)

>> Fold scrap of paper into same shape as dollar bills
>> Store folded paper with money in inventory without wasting space...

This doesn't work! While all MONEY is stackable (as in the case of the DOLLAR BILLS and PENNY taking up the same INVENTORY SPACE), you can't mix MONEY and regular PAPER.

>> Open the COMPUTER, using the PENNY as SCREWDRIVER if need be
>> Store the MONEY in the COMPUTER
>> Close and take COMPUTER



The COMPUTER has a tab on it, and its SIDE PANEL pops right open! You stash your $3.01 inside of the COMPUTER and close it up.



>> Take the ELEVATOR down to FLOOR 1



You push the DOWN ELEVATOR BUTTON, and the doors on the left slide open.



Once inside the ELEVATOR, you examine your surroundings. There are 24 buttons on the wall, one for each FLOOR of the APEX MICROCHIPS BUILDING. On the right is a locked PANEL that says it's for the ADMINISTRATION's use only. You push the button for FLOOR 1 and ride down.

>> Take the other ELEVATOR back up to your CUBICLE on FLOOR 23



You finally reach FLOOR 1. It looks pretty much the same as all of the other floors you've been to so far, except the WATERCOOLER in this case has been replaced with a nice POTTED PLANT. You push the UP ELEVATOR BUTTON and enter the ELEVATOR on the right this time, instead.



This ELEVATOR doesn't have the ADMINISTRATION ACCESS PANEL, for whatever reason. (It doesn't really matter; you couldn't mess with it anyway.) You push the BUTTON for FLOOR 23 and ride back up to your CUBICLE.

>> Plug in the COMPUTER
>> I CAN HAS MINESWEEPER NOW?



You arrive back at your CUBICLE. You get the strangest feeling that you haven't seen it in about four weeks, but you shrug that off as being downright silly.

You plug in and power up your COMPUTER, and it comes right up! ...Unfortunately, you don't have a KEYBOARD or a MOUSE to use the COMPUTER. In fact, you've never had either of these items. It looks like MINESWEEPER will have to wait.

>> Read PAGE 1537 in the GIANT BLUE BINDER



Since you actually have a lead, you flip to PAGE 1537 in your GIANT BINDER. Apparently, this is the section that talks about USB PORTS in APEX MICROCHIPS COMPUTERS. What's odd is that big BLUE LINE on the right page. As you reach out to touch it, it suddenly vanishes!



You find that the BLUE LINE has magically reappeared on your INVENTORY TAB, although outside the confines of your INVENTORY SPACES. As such, you can't mess with it or interact with it in any way! It's simply stuck there. You decide to call this an OTHERWORLDLY LINE.

>> ?

__________________


.

.Legendary themed months are back! Maybe.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!