February In The Eyes of a Gopher


Who gives a donkey’s owner’s mailman about me, right? Yeah, I’m pretty sure pretty much no one will read this article but I’m out of inspiration, and so I have to at least write one article and so I just thought to myself; about who? About meh!

Alright, so February is pretty much the month where I just get fatter, eat junk food, stare at my watch during class wondering when the second trimester will end, get flooded with tests and homework, and go on the internet way less often, as I surprisingly do have a social life. But here are my predictions on what’s going to happen this month.

1) Britney Spears WILL reveal that she’s actually a man!



2) After Peter Jackson’s smashing King Kong hit he will release a project he’s secretly been working on with a couple of actors; Pokémon: The Un-Animated Movie!



3) Cheating on Runescape will no longer be against the rules!



4) Andrew Gower almost dies because he thinks that a meteorologist was taking a picture of him, not the tornado going on behind him. He will survive because the meteorologist throws a rope to him while he is in the tornado. Can’t exactly say he won’t be in a wheelchair, though. Good news is that the meteorologist gets a free members subscription!

/p>

5) George Bush will choke on a pretzel. NO ONE WILL SAVE HIM THIS TIME!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA…

Just imagine he’s choking on a pretzel.



6) Peter Griffin and Homer Simpson will have a beer chugging contest.



7) After Jagex makes cheating allowable on Runescape they get so many rants that all the Staff Members slowly start to die one by one. Andrew is the only one left and so he must pick some new Staff Members, fast, or Jagex would have an immediate downfall. He picks the children from the Cambridge Kindergarten as the new graphic designers.



7) After the years of planning... Gophers TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!



Of course those are just my points of view. They might not become true… BUT MOST LIKELY WILL OF COURSE! I’m pretty, bye. Oh and sorry to all Republicans about giving the bad news about Bush.

Written By: HawaiiGopher
Edited By: Bartoron
Coded By: HawaiiGopher